What did the duck say after he went shopping?
(Put it on my bill!)
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
(Give me my quarterback/quarter back!)
What has a hundred heads and a hundred tails?
(One hundred pennies!)
Why did the woman go outdoors with her purse open?
(Because she expected some change in the weather!)
Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
(Because they're always a little short!)
via enchanted learning